Urdu Poetry Forum

is mah muqabla-eterhi ghazal k liay misra-e-trha tha "gali maiN aata hy lekin sada nahi krta". is bar bhi hmaiN bohat acha kalaam parhny ko mila. ham un dostoN k shuker-guzar haiN jinhoN ne muqabla maiN shirkat ki aur apny kalaam se is muqably ki ronaq barha'ei.

ab baari aati hy Judges ki marking ki. so maiN judge sahiban se guzarish krta huN k wo apna faisla isi thread maiN 28 February tak derj ferma deN, taakay 1st March 2007 ko muqably k ntaij ja ailaan kiya ja sakay....

judges maiN shamil haiN:

(Ankaboot, Aik Lamha, Kanch ki mehroo, Zain, WanderingThoughts aur Mehtab).

aur marking ka criteria ye hy:

behr, wazn = 4

andaz-i-bayan, rawani, takhayyul, alfaz ka ista'amal = 6

total marks = 10

muqablay maiN shamil members k nam aur un ki takhleeqat derj zail haiN:





























Note: sab members se iltimaas hy k ye thread sirf judges k liay hy, so degar members is maiN post na kreN... judges k elawa koi bhi post delete kr di ja'ay gi.

khush raheN, aabad raheN....
shukriya!
Intizamia www.hallagulla.com

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sabhi sharings bohat zabardast hain iss dafa , sab ko bohat bohat mubarakbaad.

1- 4+4

2- 4+4.5

3 - 4+4

4- 4+5

5- 4+4

Ankaboot.

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wahhh...is mah bhi bohat hi khubsoorat kalaam parhnay ko mila...tamam ghazlaiN hi bohat umda raheeN...marks kuch yooN haiN;

(mera pc chooNke kharab hai, isliye maiN tafseelan bat nahiN kar sakti)

Noor: 3+4=7
chilli milli: 3+4.5=7.5
Sajal: 3.5+5=8.5
Sahir: 3+4=7
Ahsan: 4+4.5=8.5

sabhi sathiyoN ko all da best...

khush rahiye

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ham bhi hazir haiN marking k sath! is bar bhi members ne bohat achi kawishaat pesh kiN... meri janib se nta'ij kuch youN rahy:

1- Noor-al-sabah Sahiba ap ne aik achi ghazal pesh ki, khyaalat khoob haiN, rawani bhi theek hy… mager ashaar maiN abhi kuch alfaaz esy mehsoos hu’ay jo izafi se haiN… (go k wazn pora ho jata hy, lekin un alfaaz k baghair bhi matlab wazeh hota hy…). Wazn k hawaly se dekha ja’ay to 3rd sher maiN kuch kami mehsoos hoti hy… overall aik achi kawish hy aap ki janib se…

aap ki ghazal ko mily:

behr, wazn = 3
andaz-i-bayan, rawani, takhayyul, alfaz ka ista'amal = 4.5
total marks = 7.5


2-Chilli Milli Sahiba! Khoob ghazal pesh ki aap ne, dusra aur chotha sher to is qadar khobsurat haiN k ji chahta hy bar bar parheN… mage ghazal k 3rd sher maiN aik bat ghor talab hy k phool to banta hi us waqt hy jab ghuncha ya kali khil jati hy… to is sher maiN mujhy aik tazaad mehsoos ho raha hy…. Over’all ghazal maiN lafaaz ka istamal khub hy, takhayyul bhrpoor hy, mager ghazal k aakhri do sheroN maiN wazn ki kami ka ehsaas hota hy...

Aap k total marks hu’ay:

behr, wazn = 3
andaz-i-bayan, rawani, takhayyul, alfaz ka ista'amal = 4
total marks = 7


3-Sajal Sahiba ki janib se bhi aik dilkash ghazal parhny ko mili… dusra sher to is ghazal ka hasil laga mujhy… bohat khoob andaaz-e-bayaN hy, misroN maiN rawani bhi hy, alfaaz ka istamal baaz muqamat pr bohat hi khoob hy…. Achi trakeeb istamal ki haiN aap ne, albat’ta wazn k hawaly se aik muqaam pr gerber lagti hy, sher # 6 maiN aap ne lafz istaamal kiya “chaah’ta” ager is lafz ko durust ada’igi se parha ja’ay to wazn mutasir hota hy…

Aap k total marks hu’ay:

behr, wazn = 3.5
andaz-i-bayan, rawani, takhayyul, alfaz ka ista'amal = 5.5
total marks = 9


4-Sahir: ab bari aati hy hamary dost Saahir bhai ki. To jnaab aap ne bhi aik bohat achi ghazal pesh ki, matly ne to bohat hi lutf diya… aur bohat khoob girha lagai hy aap ne misra-e-trha ko…albat’ta 4th sher maiN wazn ki kami mehsoos hui… majmoi tor pr dekha ja’ay to andaaz-e-bayaaaN bohat khoob hy, rawani bhi khoob hy, khyaal aafreini bhi bohat hy aur alfaaz ka acha istamal dekhny ko milta hy is ghazal maiN…

so aap ki ghazal ko milty haiN:

behr, wazn = 3.5
andaz-i-bayan, rawani, takhayyul, alfaz ka ista'amal = 5
total marks = 8.5


5-Ahsan bhai ne bhi bohat achi ghazal pesh ki, aur Maqta is qadar khobsurat hy k bar bar prhny pr bhi lutf maannd nahi parta…. Ghazal k 4th sher maiN jumly ki ghalati nazer aa’ei. k “dil ki basti maiN aalam” nahi hota “dil ki basti ka aalam” hota hy…
So overall dekha ja’ay to aap ki ghazal wazn k eitbar se mukamal hy, lekin andaaz-e-bayaN maiN bohat si gunja’ish nikalti hy….

Aap ki ghazal ko milty haiN:

behr, wazn = 4
andaz-i-bayan, rawani, takhayyul, alfaz ka ista'amal = 4
total marks =8

aap tamaam dostoN ki shirkat ka aik bat phir bohat shukriya... Umeed hy aainda bhi aap isi jazby aur lagan se is mehfil ki ronaq barhaaty raheN gy...

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As-salam-o-alaikum!

sab Judges ka bohat bohat shukriya k aap ne apny qeemti waqt se kuch waqt hamary liay nikaala...

Judges ki marking ki ro se Maah-e-February k Contest k winner ka ailaan abhi kuch hi der maiN kr diya jaa'ay ga...

ws-salam

Intzamia www.hallagulla.com