Urdu Poetry Forum

**Shehr-e-Wafa** · #41 12-10-2006, 08:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MEHTAB

Assalam-o-alaikum Shehr-e-wafa

Ahaaan buhat acha laga jii app ka reply dekh kar yahan
K koi tu hay jo Hamare sath hay yahan Means Hamare sath sekh raha hay
Kiun k Ham bhi Zain bhai ki is post se buhat kuch sekh rahe hain
App ne aik buhat acha Shair Kaha hay acha laga parh kar
Aur Hamari laboratory test k mutabiq di gai Behar par bhi pora utarta hay
Ham ne us ka kuch Operation kia hay baki Senior Dr sahiban he nateja batain gay
Hamari janib se is umdah aur kamiyab kawish par dharon daad qabool kijiay

wa salam

aray wah apne HG mai'n to seekhne wale bhi ustaad hai'n .. mile
boaht shukriya itna kamyab operation kerne kelie...
lekin abhi aur bhi patients paish karoo'n gi .. jo qabl-e-operation hai'n ...

**Shehr-e-Wafa** · #42 12-10-2006, 08:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by zain

bahot khushi huyi yeh jaan kar ke chalo koyi to hai jissey seekhaney main dilchaspi hai,warna main to samajh raha tha ke yahaan sab ustaad aor maahir ho gaye hain,is liye is silsiley ka koyi jawaaz baaqi naheen rehta,kheir......... .bahot achha laga ke aap ne na sirf yeh silsila pasand kiya,balke mehnat aor koshish ki,aor aek bahot hi khoobsurat shair bhi inaayat kiya,
aap ka shair na sirf yeh ke wazn/behar main hai,balke mazmoon,alfaaz ka chunao aor istamaal bhi bahot achha kiya hai aap ne,aor merey khayaal main har lehaaz se aek mukamal shair hai,so bahot si daad is khoobsurat shair ki nazar,qabool kijiye,
koshish kijiye ke is ko aagey baraayain aor issi zameen main aek adad ghazal keh daalain,
bahot khush rahiye,

shair pasand kerne kelie bohat shukriya aur aapki is khushi ko dobala kerne kelie mai'n phir aa gayee
aapke hukum ki tameel mai'n hukum se pehle hi ker chuki thi .. per ab nazr-e-saani ker rahi hoo'n .. jitni mujhe samajh aai hai taqtee ki us hisab se aur ghaltiya'n khud theek ker k apne hisaab se thora behter ker ke aap ke samne ashaar eik eik do do ker ke paish ker rahi hoo'n...

to agle do ashaar hazir hai'n

kisi pal rah sujhai de mujhe apni hi mujhe apni hi manzil ki
sayahi chai kuch aisi ke ik nuqta nahi milta

khuli jub se meri ankhai'n teri is such ki duniya mai'n
meri palko'n pe koi narm sa sapna nahi milta

yaha'n per doosre misray mai'n meri ke baray mai'n kuch confusion hai mujhe yeh mai'n ne "meem, ye, ray ,aur choti ye" se MERI likha hai .. kia may ka wazan yaha'n 2 hoga.... aur ager aisa hai to phir kia mujhe "meem, ray, aur choti ye" se MERI likhna chahiye ?...

aur baqi kia mistakes hongi woh pata nahi..

**Shehr-e-Wafa** · #43 12-10-2006, 08:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kanch ki mehroo

aray wahhh bhaeee...ab kuch jaan parti mehsoos ho rahi hai is silsilay maiN..

bhaee deegar members kahaN haiN...itni mehnat say tayyar ki gaii thread maiN kuch to hissa lijiye.... yeh ap sab ke liye hi likhi gaii hai

deegaran bhi aa jayai'n ge.. tum to aa jao ustadni

**rida jabeen** · #44 12-11-2006, 09:38 PM

kisi pal rah sujhai de mujhe apni hi mujhe apni hi manzil ki
sayahi chai kuch aisi ke ik nuqta nahi milta

khuli jub se meri ankhai'n teri is such ki duniya mai'n
meri palko'n pe koi narm sa sapna nahi milta

yaha'n per doosre misray mai'n meri ke baray mai'n kuch confusion hai mujhe yeh mai'n ne "meem, ye, ray ,aur choti ye" se MERI likha hai .. kia may ka wazan yaha'n 2 hoga.... aur ager aisa hai to phir kia mujhe "meem, ray, aur choti ye" se MERI likhna chahiye ?...

aur baqi kia mistakes hongi woh pata nahi..

Asslamo alikum waah bohut khoob aap ki mehnat rang la
rahi hai aap ne donoon ashaar be had khub kahe hain
aur jahan tak meri akal kaam karhi hai(jo k kabhi
kabhi hi karti hai )to aap ne zain ki batai
gai beher k wazan k hisaab se theek taqtee ki hai
phir bhi main ne koshish ki hai k aap k ashaar ki taqtee
karsakoon ab main kitni kamyaab hui hoon yeh to zain
aur bohut se sahb e ilam hi bata saktey hain k
main khud abhi tifl_e maktab hon
pehli baat to yeh k aap ne pehle sher k pehle misrey main
"mujhe apni hi manzil 2 baar ghalti se likh diya
hai ussey theek karlein ab aati hoon
taqtee karne ki aik adnaa si koshish ki tarf
kisi ,pal rah sujhai de mujhe apni hi manzil ki
12 ,2 ,2 ,122 , 2 ,12 ,22 ,1, 22 , 2
sayahi chai kuch aisi ke ik nuqta nahi milta
122 , 12, 2, 22, 1, 2, 21 , 2 , 22
(mujhe is doosrey misrey main doubt horha
hai k yeh pehle misrey k wazan par
poora nahin utar raha kiyon k jahan tak
mera khyal hai lafaz"chaai main agar aap
chay k bad do chashmi hay aur alif ko taqtee main
shumaar na bhi karein aur chey k bad humza choti ye
mila bhi dein jaisa k aap ne kiya hai lafaz "chai"
likh kar to bhi is ka wazan 12 hua kiyon k mere
khyal kmutabiq jis lafaz k oper humza ho uss ka
wazan 2 hota hai aur lafz"kuch"ka wazan bhi
do chashmi hay ko shaamil na kar k 2 hua
isi tarha lafaz"key" ka wazan bhi hay shumaar na kar k
2 hua)is baray main aap ki raay ka intezaar rahe ga
k shyad main hi ghalat hoon
baaki sher no 2 ki taqtee mujhe theek lagi
INSHALLA kal uss ki taqee bhi karon gi FE AMMAN ALLAH

**MEHTAB** · #45 12-13-2006, 11:46 AM

Assalam-o-alaikum Muhtarma
App ne aik baar phr buhat he ache ashaar share kiay hain
Aur main ne apni daanist main in ki taqtee bhi kardi hay
App k ye patient bhi bilkul thek thak hatay katay he hain
Buhat achi jaa rahi hain app

**Shehr-e-Wafa** · #46 12-13-2006, 02:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rida jabeen

kisi pal rah sujhai de mujhe apni hi mujhe apni hi manzil ki
sayahi chai kuch aisi ke ik nuqta nahi milta

khuli jub se meri ankhai'n teri is such ki duniya mai'n
meri palko'n pe koi narm sa sapna nahi milta

yaha'n per doosre misray mai'n meri ke baray mai'n kuch confusion hai mujhe yeh mai'n ne "meem, ye, ray ,aur choti ye" se MERI likha hai .. kia may ka wazan yaha'n 2 hoga.... aur ager aisa hai to phir kia mujhe "meem, ray, aur choti ye" se MERI likhna chahiye ?...

aur baqi kia mistakes hongi woh pata nahi..

Asslamo alikum waah bohut khoob aap ki mehnat rang la
rahi hai aap ne donoon ashaar be had khub kahe hain
aur jahan tak meri akal kaam karhi hai(jo k kabhi
kabhi hi karti hai )to aap ne zain ki batai
gai beher k wazan k hisaab se theek taqtee ki hai
phir bhi main ne koshish ki hai k aap k ashaar ki taqtee
karsakoon ab main kitni kamyaab hui hoon yeh to zain
aur bohut se sahb e ilam hi bata saktey hain k
main khud abhi tifl_e maktab hon
pehli baat to yeh k aap ne pehle sher k pehle misrey main
"mujhe apni hi manzil 2 baar ghalti se likh diya
hai ussey theek karlein ab aati hoon
taqtee karne ki aik adnaa si koshish ki tarf
kisi ,pal rah sujhai de mujhe apni hi manzil ki
12 ,2 ,2 ,122 , 2 ,12 ,22 ,1, 22 , 2
sayahi chai kuch aisi ke ik nuqta nahi milta
122 , 12, 2, 22, 1, 2, 21 , 2 , 22
(mujhe is doosrey misrey main doubt horha
hai k yeh pehle misrey k wazan par
poora nahin utar raha kiyon k jahan tak
mera khyal hai lafaz"chaai main agar aap
chay k bad do chashmi hay aur alif ko taqtee main
shumaar na bhi karein aur chey k bad humza choti ye
mila bhi dein jaisa k aap ne kiya hai lafaz "chai"
likh kar to bhi is ka wazan 12 hua kiyon k mere
khyal kmutabiq jis lafaz k oper humza ho uss ka
wazan 2 hota hai aur lafz"kuch"ka wazan bhi
do chashmi hay ko shaamil na kar k 2 hua
isi tarha lafaz"key" ka wazan bhi hay shumaar na kar k
2 hua)is baray main aap ki raay ka intezaar rahe ga
k shyad main hi ghalat hoon
baaki sher no 2 ki taqtee mujhe theek lagi
INSHALLA kal uss ki taqee bhi karon gi FE AMMAN ALLAH

bohat shukriya Rida itni mehnat se ashaar ki taqtee kerne aur dhair sara waqt in ashaar ko dene kelie

aur taqtee.. woh to tum ne re-check kerne per pass ker hi di hai mile

dair se jawab dene kelie mazrat khwah hoo'n per bohat mushkil se jo thora sa time milta hai mai'n HG ke dershan kerne zuroor aati hoo'n pichle do din se nahi aa pai aur umeed hai agle do din bhi nahi aa pau'n gi.. mazeed ashaar post karoo'n gi inshaAllah do teen din mai'n..

**Shehr-e-Wafa** · #47 12-13-2006, 02:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MEHTAB

Assalam-o-alaikum Muhtarma
App ne aik baar phr buhat he ache ashaar share kiay hain
Aur main ne apni daanist main in ki taqtee bhi kardi hay
App k ye patient bhi bilkul thek thak hatay katay he hain
Buhat achi jaa rahi hain app

wa salam mohtaram mile

hosla afzai kelie bohat shukriya..aur taqtee keliye bhi... aapki ki gayee taqtee se ek confusion door ho gayee.. ke kisi jaga per parhne ke andaaz se hi eik lafz ka wazan 1 hota hai aur kisi jaga usi lafz ka wazan zuroorat ke mutabiq parhne ke andaaz se 2 hota hai..

isi silsilay se seekhe gaye usoolo'n ke tehet mai'n pehle inka ghar per ilaaj kerne ki koshish kerti hoo'n aur phir dobara check up kelie aap ke clinic le aati hoo'n

lekin abhi meri zambeel mai'n aur bhi ashaar hai'n jin per pehle mai'n nazr-e-sani karoo'n gi aur phir yaha'n post karoo'n gi .. takay jo garbar ho woh specialists daikh lai'n .. inshaAllah 2 ya teen din takk hazir ho'ngi inshaAllah ...

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