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~~~!!love or arrange marriage!!~~~

This is a discussion on ~~~!!love or arrange marriage!!~~~ within the Mohabat Kadah forums, part of the Mouj Masti category; Originally Posted by Crystal_thinking hummm...Jou age app nay batai woh girls par apply hou jaye gi laken itni jaldi larka ...

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  #31  
Old 12-23-2008, 08:47 AM
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Default Re: ~~~!!love or arrange marriage!!~~~

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Originally Posted by Crystal_thinking View Post
hummm...Jou age app nay batai woh girls par apply hou jaye gi laken itni jaldi larka kahan stable hou pata hay...27 years hona chaYah atleast...

Yeh Masayiel tou hotay hee hain agar ghar waloon ki bahimi razamandi kou neglect kya jaye..khuch gharanay broad minded hotay hain woh agree bhi kar laitay hain but aysa hota kum hee hay...so arrange marriage is best choice...


aap ki baat bilkul baja hia... larkey amooman is age me set nahi ho patey...or jo ho jatey hain un me aksar zindagi k mazey loot'ney me lag jatey hain... per fir b me yahi age select karon ga...

or rahi baat ghar walon ki raza mandi ki...to us ka faida do payar karney walon ko sirf is soorat me ho sakta hia jab un me payar k sath sath zehni ham aahngi...or bahmi masayel ko saleeqey sey suljhaney ki soojh boojh ho...
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  #32  
Old 12-23-2008, 12:37 PM
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Default Re: ~~~!!love or arrange marriage!!~~~

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Originally Posted by Crystal_thinking View Post



well...aik Rishtay main as a base love ka hona zaroori hay lakeen pillars ki zarorut bhi hoti hay aik aashYana bananay k liyaH morally.. abb wOh pillars kyoon itnay strong nahi kahan kami baishi rahay gai..tht's the point to finf out...!! sirf hubby say hee rishta nahi balkay whOle family say connect hona parta hay...sometimes mis understandings create....view point change hou jata hay aur even kaheen tou taste of kahana hee differenCe bana daita hay...

char log char batain..bardasht ki kami..afou dar guzar ka Qaal..Ikhlaas ka khaam khaam hona..aur sub say bari baat mard ka balance na raKh pana...Jub hakim hay aik family ka tou control kyoon nahi..

so yeh saray awamil hain shumyla bibi..jou both kinda of marriage main exist kartay hain..

actually support abhi bhi main arrange marriage karoon gi aur iss main bhi muhabbut ka dakhal tou hay na jou zYada reliable hay...

u r right crysty k in arrange marriage not only with husband lardki ko with the whole family adjust karna parta hai and especially in joint family..... i think pillar aap ka kehna ka mtlab logo mien nhi hoga...right? if it is in understandin, compromise, support and trust tou i will say k iss mien not only women par man ko bhi adjust karna parta hi hai if both are similar with the mind then i think k both love or arrange marriage rehsakti hai........aur gar zehni ahamngi aur trust no hoga ek dusrey pe tou of course logo ki char batou se rishtey mien iktilafat paida hosaktey hien....

u r rite crysty k muhabbat reliable hai.......
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  #33  
Old 12-23-2008, 12:40 PM
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Default Re: ~~~!!love or arrange marriage!!~~~

Quote:
Originally Posted by Crystal_thinking View Post
Friedrich Nietzsche: >>
It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.>>

hummm....exactly aysa bhi hota hay...2 taraf ka view point sunna aur uss hee paR yaqeen kartay huay solution dhondna...yeh sari situatiOn critical hou sakti hay in joint family system...

husband n wife ki understanding bohut count karti aur yeh baat bhi k woh hubby say related rishtoon kou kitni ahymiYut daiti hay aur uss ki support counts...lakeen aft all aurut aik emotional makhlooq hay....so zyada contribute mard ka hee hay k woH raye aama main Mutabqut laye aur neeYut saaf rakhtay huay aapus main sub mil baith kar ghalut fehmi kou dour karain...

Friedrich Nietzsche:>>

It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.>>
nice reply crysty even i like the quote........
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  #34  
Old 12-23-2008, 12:43 PM
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Default Re: ~~~!!love or arrange marriage!!~~~

Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Shani~ View Post
kioun nahi hosakti ? pehley shadi sey pehley baat hy pakki hoti hai na ?

kiya aap kehna charahye hien k arange bhi ho aur sath mien love bhi.....matlab jab baat paki ki jaie tou lardka lardki ko ijzat miljaie ek dusrey ko jaaney k liye.....kuch aisa ya kuch aur kehna chaharhey hien aap???
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  #35  
Old 12-23-2008, 01:14 PM
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Default Re: ~~~!!love or arrange marriage!!~~~

Quote:
Originally Posted by Gurrya View Post
Nice topic shumayla

merey khiyal mein shadi ki kaamyabi ki wajah yeh nahi hai k woh Love marriage thi ya arrange ki thi parents ne Baaz auqaat dekha gaya hai k larka larki shadi se pehley bohat ziyada piyaar kertey hein aik dosrey ko laikin iss k bawajood unn ki shadi shuda zindagi itni kaamyaab nahi hoti Iss ki wajahmerey nazdeek yeh hai k shadi shuda zindagi k jo taqazey hotey hein woh uss ko samajh nahi patey aur blame aik dosrey ko kertey rehtey hein jis ki wajah se unn k rishtey mein dararr aa jati hai. Baaz auqaat qareebi rishtedar bhi role play kertey hein rishtey ko bigarhney mein so baat yeh hai k larka aur larki dono mein shadi ko nibhaney ki spirit honi chahiye aur compromise kerna chahiye dono ko

Main nahi maanti k kaamyaab shadi k liye shadi se pehley muhabbat hona zarori hai han pasand zaror hona chahiye apna honey wala jeewan sathi. Shadi sirf muhabbat k saharey bhi nahi guzari ja sakti . shadi shuda zindagi mein bohat se utaar charhao aatey hein jin ko bohat thandey dil aur damagh se hi tackle kia ja sakta hai.


kuch points i really liked k baaz auqat in relation spouse ek dusrey ko blame kartey rehety for normall certain things without understanding aur ye dono type ki marriages mien dekha gaya hai...... ... par gurryya jee wo blaming karna kahan se shuru hojati hai??? aur jo parents ki marzi se shaadiyaan hoti hien kabhi kabar lardka ya lardki wo accept nhi karpatey decission par just for parents sake wo haan kardetet hien........ i blv in those marriages ye blaming start hoti hien, miunderstanding... M I right gurryya jee????

acha point diya hai gurryya jee agar ye utar charaou k masley spouses sirf apney darmyan rakh k solution hasil karien with calmy tou kahin bhi misunderstanding nhi hopaie gi.....

but i think aap dono favour mien hou.....
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  #36  
Old 12-23-2008, 02:00 PM
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Default Re: ~~~!!love or arrange marriage!!~~~

Quote:
Originally Posted by DeEp SiLeNce...!!! View Post


jee Allah ka karum hay me bilkul thick bakiun ka baki ko pata hoga
hmm nice discution chul rahi hay balkay dor rahi hay....
hmm
first of all! clearly wana said k Love merrage ho ya arrange!... unmain ~~pyaar~~ hona zarory hay.. i think without love not even any relation can be succeded!
after that ager dono ko comparisen main rakha jaye... too i think Arrange merrage! bcoze love merrage main yeah hota hay k boy girl pasand kerletay hain aik extrem per pohanch jatay hain.. then unkay parents kabhi kabhi agree na hotay huay bhi shadi kerdetay hain per kahin na kahin koi na koi kummi rhety hay khushi main!!!
ager arrange merrage ho to after merrage bhi insan love bana sakta hay ismain koi masla nahe... her trhan ki khushi hay or sakon bhi!!! bus understanding hony chye!
shukriya!

baki ka bakiyoun se pooch lien :P
chalien iss dour mien aap bhi shamil hojaien.... first kashan love tou love marriage mien hota hi hai unhou ney love kiya hai then hi marriage,, hai,na? arrange mien love baad mien hojata hai par u r rite k pyaar hona zaroori hai....
par kashan jee aap bataien gien k love marriage mien kiya kami reh jati hai.... lekin aarange marriage mien bhi tou itney masley ajatey hien k marriage problems tak pohanchati hai....wahan bhi kuch kami rehgaie hai na......??? so in ur view u think k arrange marriage is better than love ????
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  #37  
Old 12-23-2008, 02:06 PM
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Originally Posted by shumyla4 View Post
kiya aap kehna charahye hien k arange bhi ho aur sath mien love bhi.....matlab jab baat paki ki jaie tou lardka lardki ko ijzat miljaie ek dusrey ko jaaney k liye.....kuch aisa ya kuch aur kehna chaharhey hien aap???
han jab arrange ki jati hai tou thorey arsey key baad eik dosrey sey baat cheet shoru hojati hai shayad app ko nahi pata per yahan Pakistan mey aisa hy horaha hai jo agar baad mey parents kisi wajah sey rishta khatam bhi karna chahtey houn tou larka or larki ki taraf sey hardle ajata hai keh hum eik dosrey key saath khush hain so arrange or yah phr love ajj kal eik hy baat hai
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  #38  
Old 12-23-2008, 02:13 PM
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Default Re: ~~~!!love or arrange marriage!!~~~

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pathar Dil View Post
wa lekum salam...
Nice thread and nice effort...

"Me arrange marriage k haq me hon...lekin aisi arrange marriage jo ziada late na ho...yani 20 sey 23 saal ki age k doran ho jani chaye... kyon k payar wohi sahi rehta hia jo zindagi bhar k sath ho...jo shadi k baad ho...
Agar shadi sey pehley mohabbat ho jaye to bahut sey masayel paida hotey hain...bahut sey log dukhi ho jatey hain... bahut sey dil toot jatey hain... bahut sey khandanon me narazgian paida ho jati hain...jhagrey bantey hain... or agar ye sab honey ya honey k bawjood "love marriage" ho jaye tab b aksar yahi dekha gaya hia k masayel rehtey hain...

is ki b kayi wajoohat hongi... but in short I am in favor of "Arrange Marriage"...

bohat shukrya PD

PD mujhey aapka first para. samjh nhi aya arrange marriage wo bhi late na huie hou......??? in 20 aur 23 age mien ho??? mere khayal se i agree with crysty k lardkiyoun k hisab se ye age sahi par lardkey iss age mien stable nhi hotey hien aur wese bhi kaha gaya ata this age in ka mind itna mature nhi hota hai ba nisbat lardkiyuon k..... agar aisi age mien love ya arrange huie ho to i think problem create ho hi jati in further stage pe ja k.....

aap ye keh rahey k iss age mien lardka ya lardki muhabbat karney se pehley wo shaadi karlien.....un k parents arrange marriage karwadien...???
so in short ur in favour of arrange marriage/./. ?
and PD mieney polling ka socha tah par inshallah next debate mien koshish karoongi ... wese abhi tak mere khayal se arrange mien zyada favour hien...
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  #39  
Old 12-23-2008, 02:19 PM
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Originally Posted by ~Shani~ View Post
han jab arrange ki jati hai tou thorey arsey key baad eik dosrey sey baat cheet shoru hojati hai shayad app ko nahi pata per yahan Pakistan mey aisa hy horaha hai jo agar baad mey parents kisi wajah sey rishta khatam bhi karna chahtey houn tou larka or larki ki taraf sey hardle ajata hai keh hum eik dosrey key saath khush hain so arrange or yah phr love ajj kal eik hy baat hai


its means arrange than love..... par jab parents ne tay kiya hota hai tou wo khud hi kiyun tordete hien??? aur ye wajeh shaadi se pehle shuru hojati hien....??? so aap k kiya raien hai k aap love ya arrange k favour mien hou???
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  #40  
Old 12-23-2008, 02:50 PM
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Default Re: ~~~!!love or arrange marriage!!~~~

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Originally Posted by shumyla4 View Post

its means arrange than love..... par jab parents ne tay kiya hota hai tou wo khud hi kiyun tordete hien??? aur ye wajeh shaadi se pehle shuru hojati hien....??? so aap k kiya raien hai k aap love ya arrange k favour mien hou???
kuch masley masail ajatey hain baad mey so uss wajah sey ristey khatam hojatey hain or jo main keh raha houn woh theek hai. Jee main donoun key favour mey houn
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