Urdu Poetry Forum

**Aas** · #1 08-19-2007, 09:10 PM

Salaams:

I'll cut it short.......too short actually...

Contestant # 1 : JunkiFunki

Shackles are singing on our feet

Shackles are singing on our feet
Shackles are singing on our feet

My poverty-trodden countrymen
Don�t give-up and never retreat

Our lips are sewed and hands are cuffed
This time upon us is really tough

Ah! We are ruled by a group of tyrant men
But their days are counted! Two, three, or ten

They use to nourish racist hounds
Who give us nothing but just wounds

Recall the past when we were one
And for the sake of power what they have done (1971)

So don�t split into races and castes
If your country exists, your name will last

Whether you are a leftist or a rightist
A poet, a lawyer, or a scientist

A student, a farmer, or a philosopher
A factory worker or a scholar

Just give them a message that you are one
And without your will nothing can be done

Just strike your feet on the ground
Your shackles should produce a rhythmic sound

Then song of shackles will be sung
Corrupts and tyrants will be hung

Our patience will win and our souls will dance
We won�t give the cowards a single chance

A lonely poet is weaving dreams
As he can listen to his nation�s screams

He hopes that nation�s fate will shine (InshAllah)
No doubt that this country is divine

Shackles are singing on our feet
Shackles are singing on our feet

My poverty-trodden countrymen
Don�t give-up and never retreat

Contestant # 2 : Aas

This Heart Wants More

It's a day to rekon
I have no feeling
A day to thank
And i have no meaning
I feel heavy
Like fallen off a ceiling
But i can't unburden
I am not healing

It's the eve, of that auspecious day
And i just can't lift myself comes what may

You can see i am walking
Walking slow on my own
Walking these half lit streets
Walking this way, all alone
But you can't see my inside
There lies a pain unknown
A pain increasing and growing
I can't complain and moan

You are the world, how can you see
How can you know, whats wrong with me

You don't care, and so am I
Who cares if some one lives or die
The ashes run down the slope
Ashes of those, who dared to try
To fight what came against our nation
But soon they found, it's all a lie
A lie so deceptive
You can't even cry

A lie that lives within me
It's like that pain, stingin' me

And then i joined a crowd
Like walking into a colourful cloud
They stretched all over the terrain
Hands in hands like a choo choo train
But that train was silent and still
Something in the air not there to fill
And as i stood among you all
I felt so numb, i felt so small
I felt as if i am loosing my mind
The lights getting darker making me blind
When I saw a craker flying high
And lit the dark gloomy sky

The world around me gave out a roar
And all cried out loud, "this heart wants more"
"My heart wants more"
"This heart wants more"

Those unknown faces reflected as one
They were as radiant as the sun
With hands in hands, rhyme with rhyme
The choo choo train whistled, it's time
And soon every one was in his groove
The choo choo train began to move
The train which had no distinction of race
No hint of the rich or any poor's trace

They danced and embraced their presence
And sang the songs of their INDEPENDENCE

If it's a dream i don't wanna wake
I don't wanna know if it's real or fake
My heart felt more alive than ever
When i whispered "Pakistan'll live forever"

I felt so light, i felt so glad
The pain in me started to fade
For once i thought i am again
Going to dance like an insane
But what the hell, who cares any more
This is my moment and 'My heart Wants more'

Please, only a single vote is allowed per member.
Have a nice time.

**Aas** · #2 08-20-2007, 08:57 PM

mINE goes for Junki....
as he's written a very smooth and gentle poem....reflection of his emotions...and love for his country men...

Thumbs up Junki.

**junkifunki** · #3 08-20-2007, 10:11 PM

I never knew that contestants can vote as well, so, indeed my vote goes for Aas as upto me he wrote very well!...

**Ankaboot** · #4 08-21-2007, 08:37 PM

chalo me ka deciding vote ho jaye ga ab

i'll go for Aas , junike's sharing is also great , but i feel at couple of places rhyming wasn't there.

but i'll have to admit it was bang bang close )

**chalakie** · #5 08-21-2007, 10:17 PM

w/salaam Aas.

tough as usual...dont think i need 2 say that.

mr. JF it is. reason? i liked the concept. shackles...kinda portrays imprisonment yet there's this spirit of freedom.

as for urz Aas...it was more of a flow of feelings...equally valuable yet that *spark's* missing...

-chalakie

**Raheel** · #6 08-22-2007, 08:10 PM

Voted to Aas ......

Junkie Funkie good work better luck next time

**Eqan** · #7 08-23-2007, 06:31 PM

both poems are written magnificently..its hard to decide, but i'll go with poem number 2...last two stanzas have just touched my heart..

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